Please check the web site for the latest articles… After losing a teacher friend to an abusive husband, it really hits home that abusers can kill. I posted an article about this topic under “Christian Perspective” on the web site. Since this woman and her husband were avid church goers, I was saddened to see that her church was unable to help them. I speculate as to possible reasons in the article.
This is an organization that has GREAT resources for those in abusive marriages. If you are in financial need, the counselors will often see you without expectation of payment. At some point, when you are able, you can give a donation. I’ve listed the YWCA of Lewiston, Idaho under the acknowledgments in my book. It was my counselor at the YWCA who really helped point me in the right direction.
Most areas of the country have a YWCA. If this is something you’re willing to consider for counseling, don’t hesitate to check under the “domestic violence” section of each organizations web site. In addition, most YWCA’s have counseling and help for kids too. If you suspect abuse in a marriage of any kind, the YWCA is a great organization to contact first. They can lead you to other resources in your area.
Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve spent a lot of time talking with various counseling agencies. My goal has been to start in the area I live, the Pacific Northwest. It’s amazing how much more information is out there since I began my own quest in search of counselors that specialize in verbal, emotional, and spiritual abuse. Abuse in marriage, especially verbal abuse in marriage, is often difficult to spot in Christian marriages. I spoke with the people at A.R.M.S. in Spokane and am very impressed with what they have to offer. This organization specifically addresses abuse in Christian marriages. They are listed on my web site (www.freefromverbalabuse.net) under the “Inland Northwest” category for “Regional Resources” on the left navigation bar.
As I speak with more organizations that are geared towards the Christian woman, I will post them and make comments in this section of the blog.
There are now several organizations throughout the Northwest listed on the web site. They include counselors as well as larger organizations. For those of you who live in this area, these resources might be helpful for you. I’m still looking for good organizations across the country and will post them as I get information. You may do so by e-mailing me at: del@freefromverbalabuse.net
So, I’ve heard from some of you via e-mail. Feel free to also send your comments to the blog! As you may have noticed on the web site (freefromverbalabuse.net), we plan to write some articles that will directly relate Christianity and abuse. By knowing “who we are in Christ,” this will help us to understand why we don’t have to put up with abuse. By also understanding “the character of God,” we learn why God wouldn’t expect us to stay in an abusive relationship. With the help of my former pastor (a woman), we are preparing a couple articles that should assist you through the various decisions you will (or have already made).
Please let me know if there are other topics you would like covered!
Del
I think Lori is right! Children who’ve been abused by a parent, often turn into abusers themselves. My ex-husband’s father sexually abused him. (I call him Todd in my book.) He hated his father and never wanted anything to do with him. Other than seeing his father at our wedding, we never had contact with him. I saw how the abuse affected Todd’s mom and it scared me! She is a sweet lady, but the years of abuse at the hands of her husband, had taken it’s toll on her. He treated her the same way Todd treated me. Since abuse is a form of brainwashing, it affects how a person thinks about themselves.
Continue to send your thoughts on this subject…
Del
Warning signs? This is a hard question. I do know this; had I looked carefully at the way my ex-husband treated his family, I might have noticed something amiss. The people he was close to, he treated very poorly. To me, that was a sign. I ignored it for various reasons. He had a weird family, and I could see why he struggled with them. But, isn’t that another clue?
Welcome to my site! I would like to hear from you. Please drop me a note about anything you wish to discuss concerning verbal, emotional, and spiritual abuse.